What Makes A Good Wedding Gig

In no particular order, here is what makes for good wedding gigs:

  • The bridal family name ends in a vowel. Ethnic people can party!
  • The groom looks something like Elvis Presley.
  • The bride looks something like Lisa Presley.
  • When the father of the bride gives you $100 for overtime and you are still in the first set.  We come to play!
  •  Great looking bridesmaids. We come to look!

 Some bad gigs:

  • Playing on a stage that comfortably fit one accordion player.
  • Alleys with truck docks, skuzzy kitchens, and/or STAIRS!
  • Heavy smokers.  The dry cleaning bills cut into corporate profits.
  • Unloading during a brutal, winter blizzard in the dead of winter in Chicago. They don’t call it the Windy City for nothing!
  • Gigs on Sundays, especially following late Saturday night gigs.

 Really bad gigs:

  • Playing for strict Baptists.  They don’t dance.
  • Playing for anal mothers of the bride.  One lady wanted our band to conduct a sing-a-long with the crowd and had us sing the lyrics to an old Coke commercial.  Imagine a wedding where the guests are all given lyrics sheets and the band leader is having them sing, “I’d like to teach the world to sing in perfect harmony.” (Yes, this really happened)

 

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